Through the Fog and Mist

The clarity of our path is not always clear. The road ahead, tho sometimes a welcoming path toward the light, fades away. And we are left to feel our way through an unfamiliar fog. It's at that time that we must be able to trust in God's guidance and that He never gives us anything we can't handle.

Alzheimer's is a mist that fills our course with uncertainty. "Be not afraid".

When I visit my friend, who travels this journey, I am constantly reminded of that phrase that has so often been quoted, sung about and used as a reminder that God is always with you. And God will guide you through the mist and fog to bring you home. I have had some experience with Alzheimer's patients in my hospice volunteering. But the people I met had already progressed to the final stages. Patience and reassurance are what I learned are most needed. Now, as I have watched my friend's memory start it's rapid deterioration, I offer him a hand to guide him forward on the path he is no longer able to see. He has no family, and his friends have fallen by the wayside. Now it is those kindly nurses and aides who help him to dress, eat and to use what he has left to carry on with life's journey. He always greets me with a welcome smile when I visit. But now he has started to become confused as to who I am exactly. He remembers, but then tells me I remind him so much of his friend that comes to visit him. Sometimes he can't finish sentences as he forgets what he was talking about. Sometimes he can't remember things we just talked about. Some visits are spent laughing and talking. Other visits he seems to be in his own little world. I can't bring him cookies or candies any longer as they seem to confuse him. He needs his routine to guide him. So now I bring him pictures of the bar he once owned and the people who used to bring him many memorable moments. He constantly worries about the cats he took in years ago. I reassure him that they are all OK. That's what I am there for. Reassurance. And to offer my hand from the mist. To guide and comfort him. To remind him to "be not afraid".

While bits of sunshine may peak through his thickening fog, the path will no longer be obvious. The hand that reaches out to him will become less and less familiar. I have prepared to become a stranger to my friend. The kindness of a stranger can mean so much. I have taken his hand and I will walk with him on his final journey. And we will have smiles and laughter along the way.